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Self Esteem Building In the Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program

A Thousand Years Of Light Begin With A Single Candle. Light That Candle. Be That Candle.

Self Esteem Building Is A Vital Part Of the Program

What Is Self Esteem?

Self Esteem Is The Spiritual Level Of Knowing. It Is The Very Essence Of Your Being. There are several ways of knowing:

A) MIND: WHAT YOUR MIND KNOWS THAT COULD BE PERFORMED

Knowing is what is stored in your mental bank or brain. It includes surface memory, short term and long term memory. This is your mental storage. You can recall many stored facts and tidbits of information. You may or may not know what to do with them. You may or may not choose to use them.

Not only do we have access to our own personal knowledge we have two additional resources

A. WHAT OTHER PEOPLE KNOW

There is knowledge stored in the mental banks or brains of every other person and in their body memory as skills. To access these skills, you require people interaction skills to work with their spirit memories.

E) PRINTED, MECHANICAL, ELECTRONIC STORAGE

Books, magazines, newspapers, microfiche, etc. To access this data, you require literacy skills, location skills, research skills, visits to libraries, etc. Video tapes, computers, etc. To access this data you require access to equipment, programs, training, networking, online data, bulletin boards, etc. There is adequate knowledge for beginning a successful teaching career.

Every person in this room has enough stored in their brains from educational experience, life experiences to make 100 speeches.

B) BODY: WHAT YOUR BODY KNOWS HOW TO PERFORM

Knowing includes what is stored in your body. Practice teaches the body memory until it becomes habitual. You call upon your body memory for many automatic uses. For example, when you tie your shoes, drink water, type, drive a car, play an instrument, shoot a basket, milk a cow or plant a tree.

Learning to coach soccer is a matter of teaching your body to use your voice, your eyes, your body all parts of yourself to convey the message you wish to share.

C) SPIRIT: WHAT YOUR SPIRIT KNOWS THAT PERMITS YOU TO PERFORM

You learn what effect you can have on other persons and objects in your environment by your life time experiences. You learn your "place" and the "place" of others in relation to you. You basically learn what you have permission to do and not do. Emotions imprint the spirit memory.

No matter how much your mind knows, or how many speaking skills you have acquired, until your Spirit knows you have the "right" to succeed by speaking in public, you will be afraid and will not use your mind and body skills.

YOUR SELF ESTEEM IS REALLY YOUR PERMISSION

Your self esteem is really your "rights" or "permissions" to perform that the society in which you were created has given you. That is, you learn your place in the social structure. At another level our spirit knows we are all from the Universal Creator, God, or the Creative Complex. We are created with this ultimate truth written on our spirits and reflected in our life existence. But usually this knowledge is covered up or deliberately eliminated by our first bonding group.

Our goal is to focus and deepen this spirit-knowing in the Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program. It often has to countermand the training we were given and received from conception on.

You see , when we are brought up in a family group we learn:

• The initial source of our creation
• What we really are.
• What our life essence really is.
• Why we are alive.
• How our life is propagated.
• What the very nature of our being is.

YOUR ABILITY TO SUCCEED AS AN Intibucá SOCCER VOLUNTEER IS A FUNCTION OF YOUR INTRINSIC VALUE COUPLED WITH YOUR PERCEIVED VALUE

A. WHAT IS YOUR INTRINSIC VALUE

The above components, integrated, comprise your actual value to the Universe or your INTRINSIC VALUE. Ultimately, your INTRINSIC VALUE is without limit. You have an open ended, unlimited learning capacity, creative capacity, productive capacity, loving capacity, receiving capacity, and giving capacity. To access your intrinsic value, you must change your perceived value.

B. YOUR PERCEIVED VALUE

What is stored in your spirit memory especially affects what you believe. It affects the spirit with which you do things.

What you feel about your personal value and worth was implanted in your spirit memories through your interactions with the environment, including people interactions. The people and environmental inputs you have experienced become your reality defined for you.

Since as a baby, you come in as a blank slate, the bondings of the first people you interacted with define a great deal of your innerness. Since human infants and children are helpless for a number of years and therefore need adults, the things learned from those adults are grooved into their memories. In the actual brain, the memory RNA strands are created. Why do we humans use only 10% of our brain capacity? Because we are given so many "don’ts", "cant’s" and "no's" as a child. This means you don't give yourself permission to continue your childhood inquisitive, creative expression. You learn from them what it is that's okay for you to do or not do.

In other words you learn what you can do, how you should talk, how you should act, the things you are allowed to do, the kind of career you can aspire to, the way your family should be operated, the relationship between male and female, etc. You learn all the aspects of how your life should go day to day and the conditions under which you will still be OK. As a result of your environment, you have deep beliefs about your relationship to the environment and what you are able to do within the environment. You have set limits on what you will or won't do from what you have learned and stored in your mind, body and spirit memories.

Information that is stored in your mind, body and spirit memories includes accurate data, mistaken information and filtered perceptions. What you learned of language, literacy, integrative skills and saw in the behavior of others is in your mind memory. What you practiced right or incorrectly, or didn't practice affect your body memory. What people told you and didn't tell you, did for you and didn't do for you, that you accepted and didn't accept influence what is in your spirit memory. You generalize these rules in that small universe to what is acceptable for you in the larger universe.

ALL OF THESE MEMORIES ADD UP TO WHAT YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE ABLE TO PERFORM AND GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO PERFORM!

You perceive your value or worth by what you feel you are "permitted" to do. You perceive your value and worth by what your "permitteds" are. Your level of self esteem is equal to your PERCEIVED VALUE of your world. Being in a new situation does not mean you change your behavior. In other words, what you learn is perpetuated in your decisions and actions until you make the effort to change yourself.

YOU CAN BECOME MORE.

You can change your memory by using new, selected inputs and building them into memory grooves. Following the Step by step guidelines of the Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program will change your inner beliefs about public speaking. Some types of statements you use are denials, affirmations, and Self Potentiation Inspirationals (SPI'S), etc. Positive statements will change your inner beliefs about what your "permitteds" are. Your stress level also influences your "permitteds". Your diet, exercise and relationships, when appropriate, reduce stress. This is important since stress influences your "permitteds".

When you do not know your unlimited intrinsic value, you cannot reach your personal potentials nor can you give of your inner greatness to the world. The Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program offers complete coaching programs. In you learn how to take control of all your learning processes so you understand your true intrinsic value. As a member of Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program, you get the tools you need to change your inner beliefs about your permission to succeed in soccer coach or mentor. You will see yourself as unlimited. You get a complete line of soccer coaching support products and services.

In the Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program as you participate in skills learning by doing activities your will get the knowhow to change your deep inner beliefs about your "permitteds" and to start determining your chosen "permitteds" for yourself! Return to your truth about your unlimited intrinsic value and become the potentiated being you were created to be Learn to communicate your Intrinsic value to your world as a member of the Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Program.

Let's look at a situation where there is a mutual relationship that is continuous. We'll first take a look at the systems aspect of interpersonal interaction.

Every interaction between two or more people constitutes a self esteem potentiating or depotentiating system. Let's look at a two person interaction and evaluate how Self Esteem Units (SEU'S) flow through this system. It does not matter whether it is a momentary relationship or a long term relationship. Each interaction forms a transaction.

Let's look at a two person self esteem transaction system.

There are these permutations:

1) Person A builds the self esteem of Person B

2) Person A lowers the self esteem of Person B

3) Person B builds the self esteem of Person A

4) Person B lowers the self esteem of Person A

5) Neither Person A nor Person B build self esteem

6) Neither Person B or Person A lowers self esteem

7) Person B lowers Persons A's self esteem at the same time Person A lowers Persons B's self esteem

8) Person B builds Person A's self esteem at the same time person A builds Person B's self esteem

Let's look at a a simpler version. Person A is a person of low self esteem. Let's look at how he or she interacts with a subordinate person:

Let's look at each person as having a number of SE packets.

We will look at a situation where a coach is working with a kid who has very little natural athletic ability. This coach has been used to working with kids at the ODP level. Here is this kid he must work with that seems to have two left feet and seems to have absolutely no knowledge of the game. Let's see how Coach 1 and Coach 2 deal with this kid.

What Happens When You Lower Self Esteem?

The boy tries to kick the ball across from a corner. Instead of delivering it to the waiting striker on the other side, he kicks the ball out, leading to a goal kick for the other team. Coach 1 is angry and shouts, "You dork. I knew you couldn't do it. You'll never learn to play soccer". This is called self esteem destruction or a devaluation exchange. Here is how it affects the coach, the player and the group.

The model for SELF-ESTEEM DESTRUCTION.

Immediately after the incident, Coach 1 feels much better. After all he has taken energy from the young player. This is the Devaluation experience.

Stolen self-esteem energy is like an addictive drug. Remember the bully in school? Why did he torment you every day? If the stolen self-esteem units stayed in his system, he would only have to do it once. The reason he did it every day was that like any drug, after 24 hours it wears off. You have to get another fix to feel good again.

So right after the incident, Coach 1had the stolen self-esteem energy. But like all addictive drugs, it disappeared from Joe’s system. This self-esteem unit had already been extracted from the young player who knew he didn't know how to play. Now the kid feels bad about himself and his helplessness. Now when Coach 1 loses the energy from his stolen self-esteem unit, he is back where he started. That is, he can't feel good about what he did. So now your soccer field is lower in self-esteem energy. We see what happens in Figure 13. Total energy in system (+4) Net loss to Self-Esteem System (-1)

Each time a SE unit is pulled from another person by a LSE'er, the system loses energy. It's no wonder that in families of alcoholics there is so little energy. Is it any wonder that those on welfare, ethnic groups such as Blacks, Chicanos and any other repressed minorities who are deliberately set up as LSE donor populations by the majority groups simply to use as self esteem donors for themselves have so much crime in their neighborhoods. There is no reproduction of their energy or SE units after each personal transaction is over. It is no wonder that Black populations for example are definitely growing more desperate daily. They are destroying themselves by destroying each others self esteem.

Each Self esteem lowering situation does not help the system of interactions to become more supportive. The person with LSE loses the energy and falls back to one unit. The abused recipient has also lost SE energy. At the end of the transfer, the entire loss to the system is one unit of self esteem, possibly more than one, if there is guilt on the part of the LSE abuser.

What Happens When You Build Self Esteem?

Now let's look at a situation involving the interaction of persons with HSE (often spiritual level persons) with another person. Coach 2 is working with the same youngster. Spiritual level persons as well as persons with (HSE) constantly charge themselves with positive energy by giving to others. In addition, they use affirmation and denials to deliberately build their personal self esteem. And they also enjoy building the self esteem of others. Interestingly enough instead of losing by giving, not only do they gain but the recipient gains as well. Thus by building the self esteem of others, the spiritual level or (HSE) person causes the reproduction of SE units.

Let's take a look at our two person system, this time involving a transaction with a HSE person:

Here's what happens when the ball goes over the line for a goal kick with Coach 2 working with the same player. He pats the boy on the back and says, "You got the kick off. Sometimes when you are beginning you miss the ball. And you got in a good strong kick. Now we need to work on direction. It just takes time. I know you can do it. Let me show you how to hold your foot so you control the direction the ball takes".

At the beginning the total energy in the system is +5 as seen in Figure Above.

Coach 2 compliments the player on his ability to get the ball off and send across a strong kick, As a result of Coach 2 giving this positive energy to the player, the player's self-esteem is raised. He now has one more self-esteem unit. Energy transfer has occurred as a result of this high self-esteem person giving compliments by speaking positively about his young player. They begin giving positive input to each other. This thus becomes an exchange of energy. See Figure 15 to see how this plays out. There are still only 5 units in the system since Coach 2 has given one to the player.

However, when self-esteem energy is freely given to someone else, something marvelous happens. Even though you give it away, you still have it. You say a kind word. This kind word is in your memory bank. But now it is in the other person’s memory bank. You still have it. And now the other person has it. This is called self-esteem propagation where positive energy flows between two people.

A positive act never takes away; it gives to the other, and is still retained. See Figure 16. Not only does the self-esteem unit temporarily given to the player by Coach 2 return, an additional unit is propagated because of the positive energy the scenario created. When energy flows in a circular fashion in a harmonious situation, energy is propagated.

But there is yet another bonus to the person giving the self-esteem unit. You feel good about yourself. Reciprocal transfer is the result of the good will the HSE person feels when he gives to the other person. This is not only from the Bible, but many cultures say, "give and it will be given to you." That comes from your own knowledge of how good you are. After the transaction, Coach 2 has an additional self-esteem unit.

Transfer Reproduction occurs when self-esteem is raised.

What this means is that when energy flows positively between two persons, there is no loss by either person. Instead there are now two additional self-esteem units in the system. Events that positively affect the system and cause reciprocal transfer create more SE units by reproduction.

The recipient received a compliment, another type of self-esteem building remark, or thoughtful action. The Reciprocal Transfer is caused by the good energy that flows from the recipient as a smile, enthusiasm, or a "thank you" from the recipient to the HSE donor. This energy flows in a circular direction. These self-esteem units which flow from the donor to the recipient is immediately returned to the giver. When this self-esteem unit flows into their system, they are both feeling more positive with the exchange of more good energy, and it immediately strikes a chord and reproduces itself. This is called TRANSFER REPRODUCTION. It’s illustrated in Figure 17.

Positively transferred SEU's are reproduced. Building self-esteem in others can cause you to grow in self-esteem. Additionally you are adding another unit to any self-esteem transaction system that you are involved in. This might be an incentive to you to be aware of what you are doing when you interact with others.

Because you have given to your workplace to make it a more productive place, you are able to give yourself-another self-esteem unit. For example you might say, "Joe, I'm really proud of you. You did that job just right." Now both you and Joe feel better. Become actively involved in building your personal self-esteem and the self-esteem of others. You may find that building self-esteem in others has become an irresistible part of your daily life. This is the result of SELF-ESTEEM PROPAGATION and RECIPROCAL TRANSFER and is illustrated in Figure 17.

This reciprocal transfer is caused by the good energy that flows from the recipient to the HSE donor upon receiving a compliment or other self esteem building remark or action. This energy flows in circular direction. These self esteem units which flow from the donor to the recipient is immediately returned to the giver. But because they are both feeling more love, more good energy, when this self esteem units flows into their system it immediately strikes a chord you might say and reproduces itself. This is called TRANSFER REPRODUCTION.

Positively transferred SEU's are reproduced. So you can see that building self esteem in others can cause you to grow as well. In addition you may also grow in self esteem as well adding another unit to any self esteem transaction systems that you are involved in. This should be an incentive to you to be aware of what you are doing when you interact with others.

Because you have given to your world to make it a more loving place, you then are able to give yourself another self esteem unit by saying, for example, "Joe, I'm really proud of you. You did that job just right." Now both You and Joe feels better. SO an enlightened person who is actively involved in building his personal self esteem and the self esteem of others may find that building self esteem in others has become an irresistible part of his or her daily life. This is called SELF ESTEEM PROPAGATION.

In order to do many of the things that a creative and alive person does, you need to have high self esteem. And until you have that number of SEU's in your life, you simply will not be able to do those things. Some of the things that require some level of High Self Esteem include:

• being creative
• not hurting others
• standing up for your rights
• keeping on fighting against the odds
• taking a chance
• asking a girl for a date
• doing a mid-life career change
• talking to your children
• feeling inner happiness
• resisting being controlled
• not committing suicide
• taking a stand on an issue
• having power of will
• falling in love
• risking being rejected
• seeking a new job
• facing up to problems you have
• forming a family group
• getting out of bed
• getting married
• making a speech

To grow spiritually, you must begin being about the business of building personal self esteem and building the self esteem of others.

All Intibuca Soccer Volunteers will attend a workshop of self esteem building based on the above model before beginning to work with players, coaches or referees. You will be able to take back handouts of the Self esteem model and how you can use it in your family, your career and your community.

Intibucá Soccer Volunteer Core Page | How To Become A Intibucá Soccer Volunteer | Program Fees | | How To Apply | Application Form | Contacts | Fund Raising | Development Tourism | Making A Donation | Become A Member Of A True Community | Learning To Build Self Esteem | Mission Statement | Skills You Will Gain | All About La Esperanza and Intibucá | Some Of The Soccer Youth You Will Be Helping | The Liga Menor de Futbol Intibucana | Soccer for Life, Inc | Compañia de Deportes y Turismo (CODET) | Soccer Masters Program

Soccer For Life Has A New North American Director To Head The Soccer Gear Donation Project, Shin Fujiyama. He is a student in Virginia who is already involved in volunteering in Honduras with Washington Overseas Missions and Hondukids. He will be volunteering with the Liga Menor in Honduras in August of 2005. He will will be accepting your soccer gear donations at Shin Fujiyama, 6511 Machodoc ct, Falls Church, VA 22043. You may contact Shin at 703-241-0461 or Cell Phone at 702-927-8706. Email him at shinfujiyama17@yahoo.com. More About Shin Fujiyama, New North American Director of Soccer for Life And Leader of the Soccer Gear Donation Project

Need More Information About Donating Soccer Gear, Getting Involved With The Intibucá Youth Soccer Center Or Becoming a Volunteer? Want to get involved?

More information on the Soccer Donation Project is available to you from exportfacs@aol.com. Our Soccer Donation web site is http://www.satglobal.com/donate_boots.htm. Want To Know More About The Honduras Youth Soccer Project? Email us at exportfacs@aol.com

Return to Soccer For Life Page. Participate in the Intibucá Youth Soccer Center by emailing Dr. Carol Cross at honducopa@yahoo.com or exportfacs@aol.com .

Soccer Gear Donation Program Links

• Soccer for Life
• The Liga Menor De Futbol Intibucána
• Soccer Is The Cup of Hope
• Soccer Gear Donation Project
• Honduras Youth Soccer Project
• Honduras Youth Soccer Project Information
• Youth Soccer Leaders Program
• Medical Supply Donation Program
• Women Coach Program
• Help Us Promote the Soccer Gear Donation Project
• Soccer Gear Donation Program Frequently Asked Questions
• Adopt a Team
• Donate A Used Bus
• Soccer Against Global Warming Program
• Soccer Against Global Warming Tournament
• Intibucá Youth Soccer Center
• Soccer For Life Tax Exempt Certificate
• Soccer For Life Mission Statement

The Intibucá Soccer Volunteer programs are administered by CODET, S de R L, an Intibucá based sustainable development organization. CODET has as its goal the empowerment of the youth of Intibucá through soccer. 10 percent of all above cost revenues from these vacations are dedicated to the building of the Intibucá Youth Soccer Center. An additional ten percent of the above cost revenues go to the Honduras Youth Soccer Project, with its goal the opening of youth soccer in Intibucá to the estimated 10,000 youth living in the hills of Intibucá. Additional CODET revenues will be devoted to building a soccer stadium and state of the art mountain training facility to be used by all the youth of Intibucá..

Contact Dr. Cross at 011-504-783-0421 or honducopa@yahoo.com.  

In Honduras contact:

Dr. Carol Cross or Dr. Ramon Dario Argueta

CODET, S de R L

Barrio El Morera, Frente Bazar Reyna

La Esperanza, Intibucá, Honduras

Telephone 504-783-0054

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